(Source: betheonetoguidemex3)

Influences

Sometimes you meet that person who is simply meant to change your life. You don’t know how or when they are coming, but then they hit you with an incredible force and you can’t get them out of your head. - This is how I feel about my newest character I have been writing. She is still too shy to introduce, but I know she is going to do incredible things.

 She has such an influential energy and a really magnetic personality. It doesn’t feel at all like I am writing her, but rather that I am learning about her which is the way - in my opinion, the best characters come to the page.

For several weeks now we have been spending a few hours a day together getting to know each other, she speaks a lot about herself and I listen and soak it all up. She is young, but she has so much to tell. I enjoy hearing her stories, so much so that I feel emotionally involved. I have not enjoyed getting to know anyone like this since Ben. Her world is so fantastically driving, so fluid and full, it is sometimes difficult hearing the hardship that her relationships have suffered, all of the things she has gone through. I record them though, because she wants me to.

I enjoy the time we spend together and when we are apart things remind me of her. I write them down to tell her later, as I am always looking forward to the next visit we have.

Speaking of which I hear her voice upstairs, time to start with another session. I wonder what tale she will tell.

I can not wait for the world to meet her.

(via lezbhonest)

Sometimes..

Sometimes I fracture stable minds with infection just to see insanity run it’s course. A disease is a beautiful thing to watch develop, so romantic to watch walls fall apart. Like cracking ice just to allow yourself to imagine drowning in the black, not a physical act of drowning. Simple mental experience. You’re mesmerized in the dark. You no longer exist.

Canadian customs being taken from Canadians?

A lot of people have been posting about this today,…

The fact that Canadians are having their rights stripped from them in order to avoid offending people who are not originally from this country. The proposed changes: not allowing Christmas to be celebrated in schools, and no longer allowing the national anthem to be played.


While I agree that Canadians should be able to celebrate their Canadian culture in schools.. it provides an issue for many teachers. The fact is they are dealing with children, children who do not yet understand religious aspects and cultural differences and traditions.. typically only what they were raised with in their own families.. so when there are so many different cultures under one roof as there are in Canada it makes a difficult situation for teachers. 

Having Christmas celebrations incorporated into the curriculum are incredibly fun.. but poses a sometimes difficult situation for students who do not celebrate that kind of thing. In younger grades that would be an issue, since the projects they incorporate usually end up being graded (to make it tie in to their course)
in highschools it is a little easier, since students are older and can understand and discuss these concepts a little differently. Though with younger students, teachers are somehow to explain these religious and traditional differences.. while not stepping on any toes.
You’re not supposed to discuss organized religion in public elementary schools, and even though Christmas in Canada is more a commercial tradition than a religious one, others celebrate these holidays for very spiritual and personal reasons that tie into the essential base of their cultures.
Teachers have been fired because of complaints when it comes to this sort of thing. Teaching young students without any bias is difficult, so I imagine they are implementing this to protect the teachers while trying to respect as many as possible. How do you as a teacher, teach a young student about these concepts without implying your own personal belief into the process? Children understand these ideas very differently, and so do the  parents they come home to talk to about their class at the end of the day.

Personally I wish everyone was not so touchy about these subjects, especially when moving to a country that they know has different customs than they do, but it is on both sides. Many parents (I know I saw this in my school when I was a kid) complained when our teacher discussed Hanukkah with us when we were kids because we saw the image in one of the story books we read. People like to remain ignorant of different customs.. so unfortunately that is being catered to.

The fact is though, that we are all immigrants going back through history. Our ancestors came here and changed the history and culture of the entire land. We made the native people accept that, and now people are angry of people trying to change anything on us here. I really don’t believe that is what they are trying to do, but for those of you that do, you should think on that a little bit.

With everything happening today though, all the changes that people want to see, all the equal rights people talk about I am surprised that this has been such a problem for people to accept. Even if these people did not originally come from here, just because they were not born here, does not make them any less important to our ever growing culture in Canada. They came here to be citizens, with all of the rights that we have, meaning all the rights to free speech that we have too. If something bothers them, that IS their right to say something, just as it is your right to be frustrated, there are so many different people in the world (- up to 7 billion a few weeks ago I hear) There is bound to be lots of differences in opinions.

We are a beautiful country though that offers a fair and equal opportunity for life here. I am proud to be a Canadian with that opportunity every day.. but then I see people always hating on people of other races and cultures. Saying that they are  ”not Canadian” that they should go back to where they came from.  That is a very UN-Canadian view. People come here because it is much better than the living conditions that they want to leave, and we accept them, because that is what Canada stands for.
Imagining that just because they are now in this country, that they will sit back and be mute about personal concerns and cares they have is silly, considering we as Canadians are never shutting up about the things that matter to us. Don’t be fooled into thinking I am calling that a bad thing, I love that we are such a fiery and passionate group, (I wouldn’t have it any other way!) but it sounds to me in many a cases, that we are also a hypocritical one from the things that I have been reading. They came here, they live here, they are citizens. They ARE Canadians.

 With that being said, their traditions should be respected, and being forced to study and or celebrate others against their beliefs I understand as being wrong.. but telling children especially not to uphold theirs that they have grown up with here, to accommodate them is also wrong.

I understand the want to take out the problem for all, because it is not just one side.

What people don’t seem to realize is that the pushed agenda of Christmas also affects others here as well. It affects those from low-income families and the like too. The more the idea is pushed into children’s heads, the harder it is for these families. I saw it firsthand the affects it has on families of the like as well, and the children when they are planning a less than typically “traditional” Christmas with what they have. Personally, I loved our Christmas’, we were always grateful for what we had, but I know it was hard for my mom and she stressed a great deal to provide for us what we saw as “Christmas” from what we were shown as kids.  We still got the best gifts, because they were so personal. Almost always second hand, but we never minded, they were great!
For other children who were not so lucky to even receive gifts though, the daily talks of Christmas and Santa were uncomfortable there too. I saw the heartbreak in my best friend every year when Santa came for us, and never for her. (Her parents didn’t ever explain to her why that was so it made it more difficult of course) I realize Christmas is not all about that, but to a kid, that is a big part of it, so there is a large amount of stress there too. How would you feel explaining to your six year old, that Santa doesn’t actually exist, because you can’t afford to be Santa this year for them. It’s tough. Even harder though is the fights that arise between children over whether he exists or not. Kids have been bullied for believing in Santa, it is not uncommon to see. That is probably another reason why they are trying to divert it from schools. It is something that they can protect them from, without having to address the issues of personal beliefs.

So there are a number of reasons, not just one (or one group for that matter) as to why they are trying to take this out of schools. Whether that will change anything we will have to see (though I kind of doubt it). 

Now after that detour..back to the original issue we go!

The national anthem should be left in schools, this IS Canada, and we should be able to celebrate that daily. I don’t even understand the thought process of that offending someone, considering everyone attending school here (except for the few exchange students) are Canadian citizens, and should remain just as proud to be a Canadian every day as they were the day they decided to come here, Not just on Canada’s Day. The national anthem is a reminder of those that fought for us, and it should be played every day.. otherwise the only time people will be thinking about it is on Remembrance day, and that itself has lost enough meaning as it is to most. (Which is just another thing that has angered me entirely)

It is sad that people can not just respect that there are differences in every kind of people, and that people should be allowed to show those things without always stepping on someones toes, unfortunately people are far too protective of their own views.. the world is changing every day, and because of that.. people who can not accept and embrace change are becoming more and more radical about protecting their personal traditions.

Celebrate culture, celebrate the world we live in. Canada does a great job of trying to do that for everyone that it brings into this country, so each person should still respect Canada back. Christmas is not so Canada specific, I can understand the limits on that.. though as for our national anthem, sing it proud or just smile and nod respectfully. That is one thing you can ALWAYS do for your country, and I believe Canada deserves at least that.

Much love to this beautiful Country, even with all of the Occupy stuff going on all over the world and hitting strong here, knowing a lot of people want change, I still believe this is the best country to live in. Every where you go things will not be perfect, but to me Canada; is as close as it gets.

“O Canada!

Our home and native land!
True patriot love in all thy sons command.

With glowing hearts we see thee rise,
The True North strong and free!

From far and wide,
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

God keep our land glorious and free!
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.”

Overwhelmed

In Be Kind Rewind whenever a person was shot, their brains blew out behind them as creatively placed pizza’s. I see it and I think of it as a claymation character’s solution to the hardship in the world. It’s a cutesy way of displaying a mess. Whatever way I look at it though, right now my brain feels like that pizza exploding out from the back of my head. Though at least at the end of all this work it is all good things that are sweeping over me, just so much at one time.

If all works out though, I will hopefully feel this way for the next few years. My brain exploding is just one of the signs that I am doing the amount of work that needs to be done for this, and when it all starts to pay off I will be smiling for the constant headache. I know it is well worth it all.

- Jesse

Cycle-ist

I am going to prepare my own definition of the word. See mental diagram B. 

Cycle-ist - pronounced sigh-klist, Conclusive and collective system  - see also routine. see also creation strategy. see also world theory, laws of balance. See also gears. See also mechanism. See also bicycles. See also simultaneous time compression.

- in reference life has laws and we live as gears. Consistent cycle-ists. Round and round the mulberry bush, death popped the weasel.

Life is: Short. Sweet. Bitter. Joyful (& triumphant) Vulnerable. Fragile. Beautiful. Terrifying. Surprising, simultaneously also routine.

I’m kind of stuck on a tandem bicycle and it’s like a nightmare, I am glued into position. I have to remain stagnant and sloth like which makes me lethargic and I lose my fight or flight drive. It’s terrifying because instead of the typical two seats of the tandem cycle’s design there is a good six billion plus instead.

I had a photo but it will not attach so imagine this grayscale photo of the ten men on a tandem bicycle, sweaty, angry, lost, tired, stuck. Then multiply that by another six hundred million plus. You get the idea. 

I self-motivate by turning inwards what I give to others, but I also turn inwards what other atmospheres are given to me - in most cases the latter of the two offers to me little help.

Cycle-ists don’t let go of their routine in anything they do, they live then they die, they are young and then they are old. Day comes and then night, the cycle-ist propeller reinforces another day of cause and effect, action and reaction - until the cycle is complete. It’s life, it’s death. All general, all relative, all inclusive. Conclude here.

Thought about life today (thought about life every day) We are so jaded by the curve balls and the pot holes that we expect them with no element of surprise. We hit them with full force anyways and the only typical surprise is when we escape with no damage.

What it actually means to be alive, is to simultaneously compress time. We live always in the past, walking through the present, building for the future. We are nothing until we have lived the next succession of moments we have built up for, and nothing again until the next after that.

I am a cycle-ist by nature for I am human but I want to break the route and get off the bike. Laws of life can not be escaped: I was born so I must die, but laws of living can be reinvented. 

I would like to for one day live in the absolute present with each moment how I wish it would be without building up for the next. Though each of our actions are a cycle anticipating for the reaction that will follow. The result: the successive future. 

I wish living, the act of living had more drive and meaning than what we cycle-ists have been offered, but we’re still stuck on this fucking tandem bike. We give it meaning by creating our little niches and routine, to create an importance, a wealth of emotional complexity for reaching inside our niched worlds within worlds and connecting material with a striding gear. 

I am being nihilistic after considering a death today. How little suffocated worlds stuffed with routines kill off the characters enabling them. If you do not cherish life and the ability to live it unobstructed then you time compress things too largely in your cycle. You will kill yourself simply by not knowing your own potential. Potential to breathe in the moment clearly, while providing your life with what you need.

What is it that I need now? Who knows now?

I try to create and inflict positive change for others in their lives for the future, even though I know nothing to what the future holds. I say I hope to do things which I have full intention of doing but life’s and death’s moments often sweep you off your feet. 

Nothing more romantic than a twenty year plan.

- Jesse James
04/05/11
1:50 am 

(Source: lovesexzodiac)